FLOWERS !!!!!

 my honey bought me flowers ! how lucky am i ? who's better thanME?

tupac lives....

apparently downstairs from me. after all it couldnt be those nice cali boys coming in at 4am then blasting rap music and talking smack could it? meanwhile back at building 10,greg has completely lost his mind. calling my house cursing and muttering/stuttering incoherently angrily at my vic. you know,no one likes to be dumped.no one likes to get their heart stomped but,dude,really get some pride, and assaulting a young woman is not really apropriate no matter what. your'e hurt,your'e upset ,your'e angry,filled with resentment are ya?swell , now be a man and shut up about it.honestly. made chili for dinner. it was great.im up at this hour listening to the idiots downstairs ,cant sleep,feel crappy, its just not good. i should be a pill tomarrow.--amy

deep heartfelt sigh

sleepy head dozed off and forgot she was coming here then doesnt call and explain when she awakens she leaves for the train.honestly that child... another night at the bar. more rain fussing with my cross stitch stuff. must go buy chop meat for dinner.chilli. more later---amy

buy backs and winnings

wow scared me, couldnt get in for a second. phew. anyway, its raining dogs and cats and small rodents here. great weather. so we went to the bar and drank more tham expected"gasp shock..." Had a good time but paitience always runs short after drinking. Have gotten an unsatisfactory email from victoria and a cryptic phone message. hope shes alright. she better be.  we're all in a tangle here its hardest for icky , i remember her age myself. sometimes i think if i hadnt gotten married so young id be dead. if my partying hadnt had an early end, if creating a family hadnt fuffilled my and absorbed all my energy its likely id have imploded.  i cooked tonight,dinner was good. ran around a bunch today. am sending a trade to italy sorry gotta leave.--amy

movies to slit your wrists by.

after catching the end of unbreakable,we watched 21 grams.so the evening ended on a pretty low note for me so i read an entire michael connelly book till 4:00am to cheer me up. lots of betrayal and dead hookers. lets hope i can find a way to lighten my mood.or at least ruin someone elses day. off we go.wee.

happiness is a warm meal

having a significant other who cooks is a lovely lovely thing,truely one of lifes great joys. awakening from a nap to find dinner a done deal... priceless!steaks and onions and mushyrooms garlic rice and corn. who's better than me?nobody baby, nobody. i need to dye my roots. my very blond hair needs attention cause it aint blond.and my greys are coming in curly/wavy after a life time of pin straight hair.i dont even know as yet whether we will be going out tonight. im not watching unbreakable as we speak ,or rather as i type. ive never seen it wish someone would just explain it to me.

weird

ran into someone i used to know,she doesnt look so fucking hot and she's younger than i am.i dont think i ever knew her or understood her. and im guessing i didnt miss much.the post office was a total nightmare it will have to wait. i feel like shit. im taking to my bed.

i hate being the grl

now look,i hate cleaning. i am not good at"straightening up" i dont care if ive got the tits,and all day to clean, it is not in my power to do this stuff regularly or well. i am very up front about this at the start. i was a bad wife twice before,why why why is this suddenly some kind of friggin mystery? oh never mind. most women live to have things look nice.why dont i care? hell if i know. i dont mind cooking,i like it. but this endless-putting -stuff-where-it-belongs shit is pure nonsense. i hate my life.oh to live alone and answer to no one.

alcohol the other white meat

 the damn phone again im guessing a bill collector or some such. its rainy and grey and likely to stay that way today. lovely hangover your wearing madam, is it a smirnoff? no its a killians.why why why must i do this? oh yes now i remember.

forum blues

well we're ruminating on websites and message boards and forums. how is it that one or a few nameless faceless souls can ruin,tear apart an online community like this? and more importantly,why? why do they want to,the web is infinite cant they find something to intrest them in its vastness. is it the destruction of peaceful people having interesting intelligent conversations that spurs them to these acts of verbal vandalism, who knows? but i do know from the lofty heights of my soap box,that to do nothing when they violate a forums space is wrong we have gatherd for a purpose .banish the jackals for the greater good. that is all. i need to shower and get ready-amy

human refuse,early mornings-thanks i gave at the office

so the phone rings.yeah i hate that. it does it a bunch,several times in fact. and since its being insistent i crawl from my bed and lo and behold...no ones dead or anything cool,but vic needs to alight. its raining shes been to the court house and is not thrilled. so now theres two of us not thrilled. she shows up and my glasses are mia.so i stomp about searching while the vicster regales me with tales of the court house. her morning at the court house was the result of dating a genuine unwell ,lunatic,dangerous felon. aparently the courthouse was a veritable carnival of miscreants. the way one separates refuse for disposal ,we as a people should seperate the great unwashed from,well,  me.nothing like being searched at the door,made to empty ones purse in front of god and everyone while surrounded by crack heads and wife beaters eh? i feel her pain,i do ive been to our illustrious court house with a crack head ex boyfreind a few times.and it is really frickin creepy. its raining.which is cool my flowers will be pleased. its a friday so the weekend stretches ahead unsullied as of yet by arguments,hangovers,and the like. there will be more,much more much to my chagrin.-amithany

just shut up.

im sure i'll hear this.shortly. alas i have no life so i will be ranting endlessly. i spent the day with my soon to be ex husband.endless joy.my children are moving from their home,which i left for them in arkansas to louisiana with their criminal element step mother and my other idiot ex husband.i am running into people from AA everywhere so either god is hinting or...the heat brings them out in force.my name is amy im 36yrs old i live in staten island new york.i escaped arkansas but miss it.im engaged to the best guy ever,he is a castle dweller. my dearest freind, vic is an x rated rapunzel.i read endlessly , am into halloween, enjoy cross stitch, drinking and am heavily tattoed. are ya scared yet? god knows i am. i watched the bone collector and gone in sixty seconds tonight. netflix rules. watched secret window with johnny dep the other day. it kicked ass. hit her again for me!!! watched ginger snaps very cool and how hot is that older sister?whew!recently read:the bromiliad trilogy,dead witch walking,dime store magic,cravings,am working on, after human. i hang out at several places online. makeupalley,garden partay at delphi,hauntersnetwork,halloweenforum,123stitch.google search them you'll find them or you wont.whatever. my printer isnt hooked up cause i lost the disc when we moved and i havent the foggiest  how to work the digital camera .so im screwed for posting pics for now. remember kids-everybody wants to be a playtapus until they get the bill.--amy